The estate was peaceful, the only sounds being the soft rustle of leaves in the breeze and the distant call of birds. It was the perfect place for reflection, and as I sat by the window of our room, watching the late afternoon sun cast golden light over the landscape, my thoughts began to wander.
Aleksander had revealed so much to me today—more than I had expected. The weight of the name Morozova still lingered in my mind, its history and significance making me realize just how much Aleksander had concealed to protect himself. And now, he had entrusted that truth to me, something I didn't take lightly.
As I mulled over the name, I began to play with it in my mind, combining it with my own. "Amira Morozova," I whispered to myself, testing the sound of it. The name felt powerful, ancient, and I could almost feel the history it carried. It was a name that spoke of strength and legacy, and I wondered what it would be like to bear it as my own.
But then, I thought of the name I had known him by all this time—Kirigan. "Amira Kirigan," I said softly, the words rolling off my tongue with a different sort of resonance. It was a name that felt more familiar, perhaps because it was the name he had worn in public, the name associated with his role as the Darkling. It carried a certain mystique, a sense of authority that was undeniable.
Both names had their own allure, their own significance. "Amira Kirigan or Amira Morozova," I repeated, trying to decide which felt more like me. I wasn't sure which I preferred—perhaps both, in different ways. But either way, it was clear that the choice of name wasn't just about identity; it was about the life I was stepping into, the life we were beginning to build together.
As I continued to ponder, my thoughts inevitably drifted to Baghra's words from earlier. The memory of her blunt insistence that we consummate our marriage on this honeymoon sent a shiver down my spine. It wasn't that I didn't understand the importance of what she was saying—I did. Consummation would solidify our marriage in the eyes of others, dispelling any doubts or rumors. It would also be a step toward truly committing to each other.
But at the same time, the idea of being that intimate with Aleksander so soon after our wedding made my heart race with uncertainty. This was only our second day of marriage, and while we were getting along well and beginning to understand each other, I wasn't sure if I was ready to take that next step. There was still so much to learn, so much to explore between us.
And yet, a part of me—a small, quiet part—couldn't help but wonder what it would be like. The connection we were building was undeniable, and the moments we had shared so far had made me feel closer to Aleksander than I had ever imagined. But was that enough? Was I truly ready to cross that threshold, to give myself fully to him?
I sighed, feeling the weight of the decision pressing down on me. I wanted our marriage to work, to be strong and unshakable. But I also wanted to be sure that when we did take that step, it was because we were both ready, not because of pressure from others.
As I sat there, lost in thought, the door to our room opened, and Aleksander stepped inside. His presence, as always, brought a sense of calm, but this time, it was tinged with the uncertainty I was feeling. He crossed the room to stand beside me, his gaze following mine out the window.
"Gold coin for your thoughts?" he asked softly, his tone light but his eyes serious.
I hesitated, unsure of how much to share, but then I remembered the honesty we had promised each other. "I was just thinking about... everything," I admitted. "Your real name, this place, and... Baghra's insistence that we consummate our marriage."
Aleksander's expression shifted slightly, a flicker of something—perhaps understanding, perhaps concern—crossing his features. He turned to face me fully, his hand gently resting on my shoulder. "Amira, I don't want you to feel pressured. We'll move at whatever pace feels right for you. This is our marriage, our life together, and no one else gets to dictate how we navigate it."
